Thank you Kasabian, I shall now have this stuck in my head all day.
However, since it’s accompanied in my head by thoughts sparked after a breakthrough in the telling of a tale that has been in the works since I was 13, I can’t say I’m minding too much.
I feel like I’ve been waiting years for the right way to tell this story, and it has never felt mature enough, even though it has very much grown up with me in the last decade. I don’t mind telling you that it began as a dream about a vampire that can read minds – that’s right, Stephenie Meyer stole a 13-year-old’s story: sweeties from a babba, I’m sure. But I’ll be kind enough to let her keep Edward Cullen. I chucked out the vampire element about a year after the initial idea, deciding that one of my first models for the character – Vamp from Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty – had an inhuman cruelty that would be twice as frightening without a preternatural name to it.
So, for years the story felt too gentle as I was writing it. I could never feel the conflicts that I needed between the characters, even when I placed them in struggles for their very lives, they were too pliable and co-operative, the story was too linear, too dull, predictable. So I needed my conflict elsewhere, and tried many ways of obtaining it. But last night, finally, I came up with an amendment which has kicked it all wide open.
And I’m very excited. Watch this space.
LOVE.
x
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